What's The Big Idea: John Gray - The Real Difference Between Men & Women

“What happened is higher consciousness makes us aware of both our female and male sides. An expression of that is our culture.”

Today’s guest: John Gray

His big idea: The Real Difference Between Men & Women

There are relationship experts...and then there is John Gray. The author of Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus – and sixteen other books on relationships and personal growth, John’s wisdom about the inherent differences between men and women as well as what it takes to build lasting, loving relationships have now influenced two generations of men and women. With his books now translated into approximately 45 languages in more than 100 countries, Dr. Gray has appeared many times on Oprah, as well as on The Dr. Oz Show, TODAY, CBS This Morning, and Good Morning America. Profiled in Time, Forbes, USA Today, TV Guide, and People, he was also the subject of a three-hour special hosted by Barbara Walters. With his new book, Beyond Mars and Venus, John explains why being a man or woman in today’s society is more nuanced and complex than ever. Yet, despite the changes, men and women remain fundamentally different on a hormonal level – and what these differences mean in today's ever-evolving relationships.

In this podcast we go deep on some of the biological differences between men and women - how estrogen and testosterone show up in each gender and the impact of these chemicals when responding to external stimuli. we get into practical communication techniques of how men and women can relate to their partners more effectively, and navigate contentious conversations.

Listen to the full show below:

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Key insights Shared:

  • Does biology (specifically hormones) have an impact on how men and women act?

  • How should women and men communicate without creating unnecessary conflict

  • Why “talking it out” in therapy may not the best help for men

  • How to communicate your needs to your partner in ways that improve your relationship

  • How to preserve energy and have sex more frequently

Moments You Don’t Want to Miss:

[3:01] What's the big idea you’re chasing?

[3:40] How and why  our society is changing in viewing gender

[5:40] Core biological differences between men and women

[10:16] How do we manage social roles to match our biological differences? 

[15:20] John Gray shares why “talk therapy” might be a perfect technique for women, but not for men 

[20:26] How men can benefit from a men’s group 

[28:34] How can we improve the communication in our relationships?

[23:52] The critical difference between sharing your feelings vs making a demand in communication

[37:12] “Mars vs Venus” talks

[44:17] Why great sex is essential for a happy marriage and why you should have 20 minutes of great sex every day

For anyone that wants to Learn more about John gray and his work:

- His new book ‘Beyond Mars and venus’: MarsVenus.com

- The number one bestselling hardcover book of the nineties: Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus

- AnOther Top Seller: Conscious Men: Mastering the New Man Code for Success and Relationships